Is it normal for a teenage girl to have sexual desires? Yes, it is normal because your body is transitioning from puberty to adolescence before adulthood.
Your sexual awareness is developing at the same time as your physical body. You may also have a crush on the opposite sex which is nothing to be ashamed of.
But the real deal is what we do with our sexual desires when they pop up. Do we ignore them or just go with the flow.
After all, God wouldn’t put something inside of you that he doesn’t want you to use.
But, we know that everything God gives to us has clear instructions on how to manage it.
We don’t want to end up like Mr. Adam and Mrs. Eve who, despite God’s clear warnings to stay away from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil and its potentially lethal fruit, disregarded those warnings and ate the fruit anyway. *Just saying*
Whether we are male or female, our sex drive only serves to remind us of our shared humanity.
If these desires weren’t there, there wouldn’t be any reproduction. That’s how we came here, remember?
Remember, animals also have sexual urges, but they don’t have control over it as humans do.
what causes sexual desires?
Our thoughts are one of the elements that influence our sexual urges.
I’m not saying sexual thoughts would not pop into our minds. Remember, it is part of our growth process.
But it becomes a problem when we make excuses for these thoughts to control us. It becomes the motivating factor for the kind of decisions we make.
Some of us are quite familiar with this scripture ” that as a man thinketh in his heart so is he.”
What thoughts keep you company each day? What are we feeding our eyes? What kinds of conversations do we engage in?
All these factors can affect us in ways we can never imagine. Let me break it down!
1. The Movies we watch
I have nothing against any movie app but I don’t trust them. You pick up a movie that is rated Family only to be shocked by the outcome.
Some movies start well in the beginning but halfway through the movie, sex in all its glory is put on display.
We cannot deny the fact that we’ve been aroused and that this act has planted sexual thoughts in our minds that are not easily erasable.
2. What kind of music do we listen to? 🎧
Women are moved by what they hear. Because the lyrics are so offensive, some music ought to be taken off the air.
There are some songs you can listen to that will make you feel depressed, suicidal, or sexually aroused, and quite a few will uplift you like good gospel songs.
If we closely observe, the music played in a certain environment controls what happens in that environment.
The type of music played in a five-star restaurant, for example, is classical music.
There is a reason for that selection. You can’t play such music in a club because the people who go there will be bored.
3. The conversations we engage in
If all we talk about is sex and nothing else, that can cause sexual desires. The kind of conversation we engage in informs our level of intelligence.
Dirty conversations would make people question the values we hold in our respective families.
4. The books we read
Books have the power to influence our thought patterns. There are some books that can make you feel or think sexually.
You might even picture yourself as the character in the story having sex. 🤔 That’s the power of words.
how do I stop all sexual desires?
Young women of Jerusalem, I charge you,
Songs of Solomon 8 vs 4 CSB
do not stir up or awaken love
until the appropriate time.
Practicing self-control is one of the ways to stop all sexual desires. Without discipline, it would be difficult to conquer any bad habit.
1. Be a Friend of God
God loves everyone, but he is only a father to a few who have accepted him as their Lord and savior.
When we don’t know whose image and likeness we were created after, we will keep making excuses for our sins.
The first step is to have a relationship with God so that he will guide you through his Holy Spirit. Life is tough, and God is the way, truth, and life.
How to Build A Relationship with God
2. Study the Bible
Please never believe the people who say that the Bible is boring. It only becomes boring when the Holy Spirit does not interpret the scriptures for us.
3. Submit your desires to God.
If you are tired from carrying heavy burdens, come to me and I will give you rest.
Matthew 11:28 CEV
God knows and understands our struggle with our flesh. But we shouldn’t make it hard by ignoring the causes.
You cannot do your teen life or anything successfully without God. God is not surprised 😲 about how awkward we feel.
4. Guard your heart ❤️
Above everything else, guard your heart;
Proverbs 4:23 CJB
for it is the source of life’s consequences.
If we can protect what comes and goes out of our lives, then we can control our lives.
We should not hand it over to people or the media to control it. Taking part in things that devalue our worth is not worth our time.
how do I gain self-control sexually?
One of the ways to gain self-control sexually, especially if you are in a relationship is to set boundaries.
Don’t put yourself in harm’s way or try to act like some macho and start kissing and cuddling. That’s just preparation for sex.
Watching pornography is a no-no.
Get accountability partners and if you are already sexually active as a teen, talk to a counselor, your parents, and most especially God to give you a fresh start his arms are wide open.
Consequences of being sexually active as a teenager
As much as sex can make you feel good at the moment, there are consequences of teen sex.
1. You experience a poor self-image
2. You feel used especially when you discover it was a bet to get you.
3. Sexually transmitted diseases
4. Generational curses-
Anything done against God’s order comes with dire consequences. King David in the Bible can attest to this when he slept with another man’s wife and still got her husband killed.
God forgave but he still suffered the consequences of his action when his son slept with his daughter Tamar.
Marriage is the only ordained institution by God for sex to take place. Genesis 2:24.
