Overcome The Church Hurt Today In 5 Unique Steps

A church with a cross at the top, how to overcome church hurt

Dear friend, 

I wish I could tell you that you would never be hurt by the members of a church.

But that’s a lie. I know you were shocked when the people you trusted and respected in the church betrayed you most painfully.

In those times, you prayed something like this, “Oh Lord help me punish them” ?.

“Let their cars get into a puddle” ??

“Let a rock roll over them.” 

To be sincere my dear, who hasn’t felt that way???

Permit me to say, that the reason why church hurt hurts is that we think everyone who claims to know God and attends church should at least act like Christ. (I felt the same way too)??

Before explaining the 5 steps to overcome church hurt, let’s briefly discuss the meaning of church hurt.

CHURCH HURT is the offence done against you by the members of a church. This hurt can be intentional or not.

Here 5 helpful tips to help you overcome church hurt?


Hands raised to the blue sky with broken handcuff, overcoming church hurt

The church is like a hospital and in this hospital only the specialist (The Holyspirit) can tell you categorically what medication each person needs and to what degree.

Then He said to the disciples, “It is impossible that no offences should come, but woe to him through whom they do come! Luke 17:1

We’re created as social beings and in the course of interacting it is safe to say that misunderstanding is bound to occur.

Did you know, that unkind Timothy or bossy Susan(no offence if that’s your name) who sits across your desk at work are still the same people in church every week?

Yes, they are, so will you stop church because of them? They didn’t lay their lives for you on the cross of cavalry neither did they shed their blood. Instead, Jesus Christ did all that for you and me.

Why give people such power to determine your happiness. Give it to God and let Him heal your heart.

It takes a lot of energy to hate and less to forgive. The people who hurt us often act out of ignorance while others are just distractions from our purpose.

The first step to our freedom is to ask God to heal our hearts and teach us to forgive because there is no perfect church only a perfect God.


Woman Standing Near Open Door About to Step Outside, church hurt

Ah! Ah! Here lies another problem, leaving a church without been properly guided is a waste of time.

Every church has its issues and the truth is if you’re not healed from your previous hurt, going to another church would only make you suspicious of the people in your new environment.

Only move to another church when you’ve heard from God and you’ve sought godly counsel.

There is power in corporate prayers because you get to encounter God’s grace dimension and God’s gifts on different people. Worshipping God online just to avoid certain people isn’t the solution either


A man talking to a therapist, church hurt

Please dearie, in other to overcome the church hurt you must also be willing to admit when you’re wrong.

Hun! hun! Hold up, don’t try to justify your wrongs. Let’s be honest we all are works in progress because we are human beings with flaws. So be willing to apologise when you are wrong too.


Aside from praying for God to heal your heart, you can seek counsel from other faith-filled believers.

Who is willing to pray with you and guide you when you want to overcome the church hurt.

While seeking godly counsel, It is important to attack the problem and not the individual. That can be hard but thank God the Holy Spirit can help us achieve that.


Too many people get stuck in the problem and it becomes hard for them to overcome the church hurt.

This has happened to me many times and I can tell you that it is not a pleasant experience. The sleepless nights(I love my sleep by God’s grace), emotional torture, hindered prayers.  Just to mention a few.

The funny thing is, the people who hurt us would have an emotional stress free night sleeping on their comfy bed

Without giving a care in the world about how we feel because they’ve moved on while we wallow in bitterness(crazy isn’t it)


Church hurt is almost inevitable because you’re interacting with people. It is better to let God enlarge our capacity to forgive even when it’s hard.

My question to you is what tip from this post would you apply? Or how have you dealt with hurt in church?

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2 thoughts on “Overcome The Church Hurt Today In 5 Unique Steps”

  1. Adeola Esther Ogunsusi

    In as much as we want to let it go,it is not easy but we have to. Note also that letting will not happen at once,its a gradual process,if it warrants you staying away for a while please do so. Thank you

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Thank you for stopping by! On this side of the internet, we talk about navigating life as a teen and steps to building our faith in God.
I know what you’re thinking “another church stuff”(No it’s not)
These are things I wish I knew. I know what it’s like to be bullied, have a crush, or lose a loved one.
Nothing was written here to judge you but a conversation between sisters and the Holy Spirit.